Tears and Beers grief group, at The Duck pub, Newark, offering relaxed and social space for people who’ve lost loved ones

A grief group is offering those who’ve lost loved ones a chance to meet people in similar situations and enjoy socializing, without guilt.

Tears and Beers was set up by Lorna Allen in April this year, a year on from her losing her mum.

After struggling to find grief groups that weren’t in the daytime, during her working hours, Lorna took the leap in setting up her own group to help herself and people in similar situations cope with their grief.

The group meet at The Duck pub in Newark, in a private room, on the first Thursday of each month from 6pm, to socialise and meet like-minded people in a relaxed and welcoming atmosphere.

Lorna said: “I lost my mum in April 2023, and it was quite sudden.

“I’d lost a few grandparents before but I never expected the way grief affected me. It was a surprise how it affects you day to day — you see other people go through it and they look normal, you think it’s just a matter of time and you get over it.

“I had grief counselling and then looked for a group, but they were all in the daytime. I joked with someone at work that I should set up my own, and then I put out a post on Facebook to see what people thought.”

Now, the group has around 20 attendees, and there is no obligation for people to come along every month.

“Some come in now and again, and some come in every week,” Lorna added.

“One of the first counselling sessions I had was going around in a circle and everyone talking about their grief and crying — I didn’t want that.

“Everyone knows why you’re here, you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. It’s more social, and a safe space to talk if you do want to.

“Sometimes there’s tears, sometimes there’s just laughter.”

Despite the ‘tongue in cheek’ name Tears and Beers, there is no obligation for anyone to comes along to have an alcoholic drink — the pub also serves soft drinks or coffees — nor to cry.

Lorna explained it can also allow people to have fun ‘guilt free’ while they cope with their grief, as they are with the group.

They also had a summer social ‘No tears, just beers’ and have planned a collaborative cheese board night for their December meeting.

The group’s next gathering will be on December 5, and you can keep up to date on the group’s Facebook page Tears & Beers.